June 21st, 2005 | The lowdown by Aliwyn Cole

A Day Out in Bangkok.

Before I came to Thailand, a friend told me about Bangkok. She described it as a "noisy, smelly city, with a great friendly vibe". Others in Thailand describe it as the place to go for a night out, great markets and shopping, and also as an extremely tiring city.

I go prepared: a number of cool cotton tops and pants, an outfit to wear on a night out, and as much money as I dare spend. I take a mini bus, from a mini van office next to Burapha University, Bangsaen, for 80 baht. I arrive at Victory Monument after an air conditioned and peaceful journey, which takes an hour and a half. I now have two choices: I can take a taxi to Kao San road, as this is the nearest train stop to the reputed tourist area for shopping and bars, or I can take the BTS sky train. I have arranged to meet a friend at Nana, and so I buy a 1 day travel card for 100 baht, and contemplate taking a look around the part of the big city accessible by train.

I arrive at Siam, and don't get much further. I find a plethora of shopping centers, cinemas, and food courts. I explore the Discovery centre, which hosts designer label stores and hairdressers, including Diesel, French Connection, Gas, and Vidal Sassoon.

The price tag on every item is the same as a months wage or more for the average Thai person. Thailand is a cheap place to visit and shop for the Western visitor, but designer labels imported to this country are the same price as in the West, making them an extortionate price in this country. I wonder who buys them.

I proceed to the outdoor markets sprawled around the sides of the MBK centre, where I again find designer labels, this time mixed and matched and much cheaper in price. I also find hand-made wares, including silk, linen, shoes, and bags. As I wander between the shops and stalls, smells of fresh orange, fried bananas, chicken, and noodles waft towards me. My stomach reminds me that I'm hungry. By this point I'm really hot, the peak mid afternoon time combining with the heavily congested roads and buildings which make up the area, to create an oven-like temperature.

I decide to explore the MBK centre, and head immediately for the food court on the top floor. I am greeted at the entrance by the token lady-I buy a hundred baht of tokens, and look around. I can choose from Chinese, Vietnamese, Indian, Japanese, and Thai food. I eventually decide to get my old favorite, black lentil dhal, chickpea curry, and vegetable samosas. I settle in front of the huge video screen, built into the wall of the MBK centre. J Lo struts and croons to a mesmerized and hungry audience of Thai shoppers. The food is delicious, and so I finish quickly, and am soon ready to move on.

As soon as I exit the food court, I find stalls selling fake diesel denim, DVDs, and other interesting little nick knacks. I spy a little stall, which sells magic tricks, and after a half hour demonstration of tricks by the little Chinese man who runs the stall, I buy magnetic dice and a magic book-magic tricks are always useful when teaching children, as I do. I move down a couple of floors, to find a number of stalls selling cut-price cosmetics. I can only assume they have fallen off the back of a wagon, so to speak, as I find Kerastase and Clarins and many other major brands, for half the normal retail price.

By this point I'm a bit shopped-out, and decide to find myself a room nearby. I take the train to National Stadium, and head for Rama 1 Road, where there are a multitude of cheap rooms to be found. I get a room in A-One Inn, which has double rooms for 500 baht; including air-con, cable T.V., and a hot shower. I dump my bags of wares on the spare bed, wash, watch Thai MTV, and fall asleep.

An hour later, I rush out the door, and on to Nana, where I was meant to meet my friend a half hour ago. Luckily this isn't a stress, as we are both well acclimatized to the chilled-out attitude of Thailand-nothing really matters here, as it is too hot to get stressed. I arrive at Nana ten minutes later, and meet my friend in Star-bucks, where I wake my brain with coffee. We then head to the Middle Eastern area, just off Sukhumvit Road, and order lamb kebabs, hummus, and pita bread. There are a multitude of restaurants to choose from, offering Middle Eastern and Indian food.

Then we take a look at the stalls that line the sides of Sukhumvit Road. This is a great place to shop if you are a man; silk boxer shorts and shirts, fake designer watches and T-shirts, and also a few ladies. I have been looking for a new rucksack for a while, and I find it here, in one of many shops selling fake label bags-I pay 800 baht for a fake North Face 50 liter bag. We then head back to the BTS station, where we are greeted by disabled and child beggars. Apparently, they are part of a ring of beggars, who beg all day, before handing over their money to their 'boss', who looks after them in return. I don't know this for sure, so I empty my purse of loose change into various hats and plastic cups which line the walkover.

We take the train to Sala Daeng, and make our way to soi 7, the official gay clubbers street. A personal favorite of mine is the nicknamed 'cushion bar', so called because of its outside seating area, which consists of lots of comfy cushions. The waiter brings us a menu of cocktails-he's wearing the shortest hot pants I have ever seen-and we order two MaiThai cocktails. Five MaiThais later and we move over the road to a small bar with a cozy dance floor, and a DJ who likes South American music.

We dance around like the crazy heads we are after a few too many cocktails, before moving to a club on soi 9, where we find about twenty bongo drummers and loads of people dancing after too many cocktails, just like us. We bop the rest of the night away, before hurrying to catch the last train at midnight. I go back to my room, and fall asleep to Thai MTV.