February 10th, 2006 | The lowdown by Josh Gowin

The Bountiful Meals of Moscow.

Hungry? Why grab some boring candy bar you can have anywhere in the world? Why not grab something that screams excitement? Try something that pushes the bounds of culinary imagination. Of course, in Moscow, I’m talking about a potato.

Is your mouth watering in anticipation yet?

Well, I kid you not, this is quite possibly the quintessential dining experience if you want to spend your time here like a Muscovite. Kroshka Kartoshka is a chain of potato vendors that line the streets of Moscow, usually just outside your nearest metro station.

On my arrival, I must admit that I was a skeptic, thinking, “Do they really sell potatoes outside with little more than a narrow roof overhead to protect you from the grips of winter?” However, upon asking around, everyone agreed that, though its appearance isn’t glamorous, the potato has a chic all its own: it’s a hot snack, and you can choose from authentic Russian salads and garnishes to turn this tuber into a flavor sensation. It took me some time to come around, but once I got over my timidity and haughtiness, I realized that they’d been doing something right over here.

Typically, you order your potato, and they pull it directly from the oven, unwrap the foil, and add butter and cheese. Then, you can choose from an average of 18 more toppings, each costing the equivalent of approximately 50 cents (U.S.). You can choose from, to name a few, a mushroom and sour cream concoction, a wonderful goat cheese called brinza which is mixed with dill, ham and cheese, an eggplant and vegetable medley, and a crab salad. Each adds a unique perspective to your dining palate.

I guess perhaps now is a good time to mention that it’s somewhat rare in Russia to find English speaking staff at establishments, so I’ll give you a few pointers in case you’re inclined to learn anything. It’ll certainly make ordering easier. When you choose from the numerous options, you can point to it and say “Vot etah,” which means “this one.”

As far as prices, it’s marked, but to give you an idea, it should be 50 rubles for a potato with one topping, and then 15 more for each subsequent addition. This is approximately the equivalent of $2 per potato. It’s not a bad deal, considering Moscow is surprisingly sparse when it comes to inexpensive, edible dining options.

Also, if you’re not hungry enough to devour the entire potato, you can choose a cheese toast, which distinctly resembles grilled cheese. To this, you can add many of the salads to give a new meaning to a classic snack. This has quelled my rumbling stomach on numerous occassions.

Thus, those of you coming to Moscow have a convenient way to keep your blood sugar up which not only lines your stomach warmly, but also tastes wonderful and makes you feel like a local. Look for the green signs and red lettering above the carts along the major thoroughfares. Priatnova appetita.