January 30th, 2006 | The lowdown by Aaron Fowles

Get Your Shot of Musical Therapy at Klinika Muzyczna.

Klinika Muzyczna is a pun on the words Klinika Medyczna (Medical Clinic). Instead of offering medical advice, Klinika Muzyczna serves up ample doses of fun, good music, and a great atmosphere.

The first thing that catches your eye is the illuminated shelf behind the bar that makes the bottles glow. While the shelf holds nothing out of the ordinary, the selection is vast enough to leave none but the uber-snobbish unsatisfied.

This pub is great. Situated just a half-block away from the Stary Rynek at the corner of Wielki and Klasztorna, Klinika Muzyczna packs the most zing for your zloty than anywhere else in the area. A very cold draft of Lech will run you only 5 zlotys — at least two zlotys cheaper than most pubs in the area.

Be sure to try one of the “hot dog” shots. There are seven varieties: The Mad Hound, The Hot Dog, The Andalucian Dog, The Kowalski, Pavlov’s Dog, The Hound of the Baskervilles, and (for the strong-livered) The German Shepherd. This writer, after consuming the infamous Hot Dog, still had the lucidity to scribble on the back of a napkin: “Like a summer’s eve, red at the bottom and clear at top.” Prices for shots range from 5-10 zlotys and are served with a smile by the self-styled “doctors” standing in the “operating room.”

The interior does not belie its name — this place is clean. From the shiny tables to the antiseptically stark walls, Klinika oozes sterility. This dedication to cleanliness extends to the bathrooms — a welcome deviation from the norm in this area. And for those wishing to bone up on their anatomy, the walls are hung with various well-labeled diagrams of the human body.

If you need to work off the side-effects of the medication, there is a dance floor in the basement overseen by DJ’s from Radio Afera, a local rock station. After you boogie you simply must crash out on the white vinyl couches; they’re brilliant.

This newcomer pub/club boasts the right combination of a good location, sensible pricing, a smashing atmosphere, and good staff that makes you want to keep coming back for more.